How does One Prioritize Chaos?

Isn’t that an excellent title for a blog entry? Here’s how I came up with it…
I’m in therapy, I’m in chaos, I started asking this question of myself and a few others.

I was taught some time ago that therapy operates in a circular pattern, overlapping itself in its (hopefully) forward movement. I’ve also learned, for myself at least, that I probably will never be ‘cured’ in the classical sense but that doesn’t preclude healing. It does mean that I get to learn how to progressively become more functional with my dysfunction, possibly to the point where at least of few of the symptoms or behaviours don’t appear to exist anymore. I hope that I’m learning how to strengthen my weaknesses and not be as demanding of my strengths and/or learn how to utilize them better so that I can live and feel better.

But DAMN if it isn’t two-steps-forward-one-step-back-chachacha, step-to-the-side-chachacha, swing-your-hips-chachacha, wave-your-arms-chachacha, change-the-meds-chachacha... you get the idea.

And you know what also drives me crazy(-er)??? That half of the healing is revealing, and the other half is dealing.

Oh sure, you’d think that’s a simple straightforward concept and it is, in theory. In PRACTICE it’s a freakin’ mess. Always “more will be revealed”, always “another layer of the onion”, always another approach to consider, and none of these things happen without time invested.

Just realized that simply writing these sentences exhausted me.
Time to invest some of that time into a nap.

I AM GOING TO HURT SOMEBODY!!!

I AM GOING TO HURT SOMEBODY!!!

ARGGGGGHGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

Okay, here’s the scoop… earlier today I went to the Microsoft site, got a troubleshoot utility, and actually got my BloggerforWord working again.

And THEN, for some INEXPLICABLE reason, it started giving me those freakin’ error messages again.

I am so pissed off right now. So I don’t know if I’m going to finally get around to posting a proper post but for now;

Thank you Michael and Jerry and everyone else who’s been stopping by to check up on me. I don’t behave like it but I do appreciate it.

Jerry, you are not a nag. I found your efforts comforting. Thank you for caring.

Michael, the day I finally stopped by to check up on you for the first time in a long time, what do I see? BILLY G’s a guest speaker??? LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL. You are either a true gentleman or absolutely out of your freakin’ gourd.
I’m suspecting both!

Okay, that’s it for now. I don’t know if I’m stable enough to keep from giving into the impulse to do something unkindly. In fact, I just decided I AM going to give into it!
I wunder where da pussycats went to, heh-heh-heh-heh-heh.
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ADDENDUM-dum-dum-dum!

This time the freaking thing worked.
AGGGGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGHG!